Sausage Party!

Breakfast of Champions: The inexpensive tube of sausage you can buy at any grocery store can be cut hamburger wise, packaging and all, into circular patties to be cooked in a skillet.  Do remember to remove the packaging before placing the patties into the skillet.

This plus eggs over easy and toast is truly the breakfast of champions

Also, be sure to wash your hands and clean the knife and whatever surface you used to cut the tube of sausage into patties on well because raw sausage is filled with all kinds of disgusting germs and such.

Me when I first discovered this use for these tubes of sausage:

Correct number of fingers: check.  

Correct proportions: not so much.

With Google, Car Drives You:

Apparently, when you have tons of cash and a bunch of the most intelligent people on the planet working for your company, you work to make the technology imagined in science fiction a reality.  At least that seems to be what Google is doing because according to the beginning of this article from the New York Times Google is lobbying the state of Nevada to allow self-driving cars to travel on the roads.

I'm all for the idea as long as two conditions are met:  One, the car must not look like those from the surprisingly good JCVD movie, Time Cop:

Primer is the color of the future

Two, Google must do hours and hours of of testing on this self-driven car on some out of the way, testing facility or track miles and miles away from anyone that could possibly be injured or killed if there is a glitch with the prototype.  As we all know from Hollywood, robots tend to have a few minor glitches to work out when they are first created:

I read on a little further in the article to find out what specially designed, top-secret test track Google's engineers had devised to find that last year Google said that:

"it had test-driven robotic hybrid vehicles more than 140,000 miles on California roads — including Highway 1 between Los Angeles and San Francisco."

Holy balls, I lived in Los Angeles last year!  

TL;DR: I suggest buying inexpensive sausage in a tube, cutting it into patties and frying it up the next time you're hungry.  Also, Google hatches a plan to allow people to perform Google searches while we drive.